Table: Critical Hits (Table of Many Tables)

This table from the Table of Many Tables describes a variety of critical hits emphasizing death and dismemberment by way of sharp and/or pointed weapons. This table may be used for blunt weapons by replacing "severed," "stabbed," and "cut" with "smashed," "mashed," and "crushed."

Critical Hits

Roll 1d12

1. Pop of the Tops! Head pops off and flies through the air. Death probable.
2. Costs an Arm and a Leg! Both arm and leg on one side severed. Lopsided.
3. Give 'em a Hand! Hand severed.
4. Footloose! Lose a foot.
5. A Poke in the Eye! Eye poked. Not that bad. Unless poked by something sharp.
6. A Frog in One's Throat! Actually, a stab in the throat. Potentially fatal.
7. Hear Ye! Ear cut off. Unpleasant.
8. Achoo! Nose detaches. Inconvenient.
9. Halves! Severed in half horizontally.
10. Splits! Severed in half vertically.
11. Have a Heart! Stabbed in the heart. Recovery doubtful.
12. Ouch! Purse or moneybelt lifted by weapon. No damage, but very painful.

Table of Many Tables (Contains Tables)

The First of April is nigh, and if one listens carefully, one can hear the mating call of the random generator as it wanders through boxed text and battlemats. Ready thy dice and cast them to learn thy fate!

Table of Many Tables

Roll 1d20

1. Roll on the Critical Hits Table!
2. Roll on the Fumbles Table!
3. Roll on the Treasures Table!
4. Roll on the Pickpocket Table!
5. Roll on the Discount Magic Table!
6. Roll on the Cursed Sale Table!
7. Roll on the Wandering Monsters Table!
8. Roll on the Wandering Minstrels Table!
9. Roll on the Whimsical Tricks Table!
10. Roll on the Dreaded Tortures Table!
11. Roll on the Dungeon Furnishings Table!
12. Roll on the Furnished Dungeons Table!
13. Roll on the Character Backgrounds Table!
14. Roll on the Character Foregrounds Table!
15. Roll on the Useful Contacts Table!
16. Roll on the Useless Acquaintances Table!
17. Roll on the Alternative Alignments Table!
18. Roll on the Family Heirlooms Table!
19. Roll on the Spells Table!
20. Roll on the Misspells Table!

N.B. Results of the Table of Many Tables (resulting in more tables) are being added daily. [Edit: And it is now complete.]