Hirelings You Say?

Abruptly, I am directing you to the article "Hirelings and You" in Among Cats and Books because I agree with it, I want to share the wisdom therein, and I want to remind myself to read it again later.

Give hirelings a chance.

Hello-ween, Goodbye Blogging Challenge

I am disappointed but unsurprised that I have received no suggestions in answer to my request for October blogging challenges. Once again, my aspirations to engage in Halloween-themed blogging exercises before the onset of Christmastime overwork are nothing more than ashes. I have searched in vain, but the age of great search engines is likely condemned to the past. I need an outside impetus to aid me in my end-of-the-year blogging, but I have neither prompts nor encouragement. Unless I have a sudden inspiration in the next few days, October will continue to be just another month.

To my actual living readers: Hello! Thank you for reading. Sorry about the preceding paragraph. I am fighting a headache and various feelings of existential dread. How are you?

Peace.

October Blogging Challenge Search

Do any of my readers participate in or know of any October blogging challenges that are Halloween or horror-themed and relevant to role-playing? If so, please leave a comment. I need good seasonal prompts. No a.i., please.

Table: ill-conceived reasons to adventure

Another stray table! This is the tenth table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

ILL-CONCEIVED REASONS TO ADVENTURE

Roll 1d20

1. An amateur botanist and professional florist, you are interested in specimens native to great dark swamps such as the Great Dark Swamp (from Whence None Return).
2. An amateur entomologist and collector of insects, you have heard that there are several unclassified species of beetles reportedly found in catacombs and tombs.
3. A composer of songs, you seek inspiration for your next ballad in the ruins of Castle Doom or any equally forboding fortress that might be haunted.
4. A "people person," you are eager to meet as many people as you can no matter how isolated or xenophobic they may be.
5. An entrepreneur, you know there are lucrative opportunities awaiting you on the fringes of civilization and/or sanity.
6. A pioneer, you have trails to blaze through the most benighted, hellish, fiend-infested wilderness to get to that perfect plot of arable land you know awaits you on the other side.
7. An animal-lover, you are convinced that there are beasties craving affection and tender loving care even in the vilest recesses of the subterranean ecosystem.
8. You prefer to picnic in uncrowded locales faraway from the intrusiveness of towns and roads — faraway, in fact, from any sign of civilization or security whatsoever.
9. An au pair by profession, you are scouting out sites for potential field trips. Spelunking is educational!
10. A student, you were instructed to continue your research "in the field," which may or may not mean desolate, barrow-covered heaths.
11. Noticing a string leading into a dark labyrinth, you thought you would follow it and see where it takes you, winding it onto a spool as you go...
12. You are nostalgic for the golden age of a dead civilization and seek to bask in its genius by picking through the bones and rubble of its long deserted ruins.
13. According to your horoscope, you will meet a stranger who will make a proposal. This is a time of great change in your life. Do not be afraid to try new things. Embrace the surprises that Life gives you!
14. You have heard that subterranean environments are great for those who suffer from allergies. You have many allergies.
15. A chef who takes freshness of ingredients seriously, you have heard that a certain rare and exquisite mushroom you seek can be found in certain caves...
16. A promising student-doctor, you need cadavers with which to cram for your tests, but cadavers are expensive and difficult to obtain in towns where a high percentage of the population is superstitious and mob-inclined. Catacombs, however, are safe from prying eyes and the cadavers there are free for the taking!
17. The fortune-teller sees a hazy image. For two silver pieces it becomes clearer. Ah, yes! It is... a man. Or perhaps... a woman. In... a tavern. The person is holding... a map! A very old map. Another image... becoming clearer... hills of gold and precious jewels! (This fortune is provided for entertainment purposes only.)
18. Your chums have dared you to spend at least one night in the old abandoned cavern/dungeon/manor house/mine shaft (pick one).
19. A stage magician, you are convinced that you can perform the greatest illusion ever seen if you can find the perfect location. Someplace authentically spooky would do nicely.
20. Although Chaotic humanoids and their philosophy leave you nonplussed, you are willing to visit their homes and listen to their side of the argument.

[This table originally appeared here as a humorous version of this table.]

Table: Unexpected Visitor

Table time! This is the ninth table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

Unexpected Visitor

Roll 1d20

There's somebody at the door...

1. An assassin.
2. A baby (and rightful heir to the throne) left on the doorstep.
3. A baby (demon) left on the doorstep.
4. A door-to-door tinker.
5. The Grim Reaper.
6. An imp.
7. An inebriated fop.
8. An itinerant cleric.
9. A missionary.
10. A pilgrim.
11. A robber.
12. A royal messenger.
13. A squirrel requesting a nut.
14. The taxman.
15. A troubador.
16. A weak and weary wandering knight.
17. A wizard.
18. Your arch-enemy.
19. Your evil (good?) twin.
20. Your mother.

[This table originally appeared in "RPGaDay 2025: Day 21" ("Unexpected").]

Table: How to Enter an Alternate/Parallel/Pocket Universe/Plane

Time for a table! This is the eighth table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

How to Enter an Alternate/Parallel/Pocket Universe/Plane

Roll 1d20

Via...

1. An alien artifact.
2. An altered state.
3. An archway engraved with mysterious symbols.
4. Astral projection.
5. Conveyance by an unnatural beast.
6. An earthquake.
7. A fissure.
8. A floating portal.
9. A free-standing door.
10. A funhouse ride/rollercoaster.
11. A giant hat.
12. A hole.
13. An ingenious contraption.
14. A magic pool.
15. A mirror.
16. A painting.
17. A potion.
18. A tornado/cyclone.
19. A vortex.
20. A wardrobe.

[This table originally appeared in "RPGaDay 2025: Day 20" ("Enter").]

Table: Most Memorable Encounter

The most memorable encounter is sure to be found in the most memorable encounter table. This is the seventh table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

Most Memorable Encounter

Roll 1d6

1. A fully clothed centaur (with briefcase).
2. An enigmatic macroplanarian.
3. A Floating Head of Lettuce (of Doom).
4. A gourdian angel (primarily protects gourds).
5. An octopus piloting a mecha.
6. The Aquabats!

[This table originally appeared in "RPGaDay 2023: Day 29" ("Most memorable ENCOUNTER").]

Table: Alternative Wizardly Abodes

Not every wizard resides in a tower. This is the sixth table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

Alternative Wizardly Abodes

Roll 1d8

1. mountain cave
2. stilt hut
3. geodesic dome
4. ziggurat
5. cottage
6. bungalow
7. A-frame
8. penthouse

[This table originally appeared here (#RPGaDay2020 19. "Tower").]

Table: Forest Encounter

What or whom will you encounter in the forest? This is the fifth table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

Forest Encounter

Roll 1d6

1. You encounter a wolfwere dressed like a typical grandmother. It has the power to transform into Graham Chapman.

2. You happen upon a ring of toadstools. Don't dance around it or you'll turn into a toadstool yourself. If you eat one, well, that's another random table.

3. You chance upon a house constructed entirely of candy and baked goods. If you're short enough, the resident will try to eat you when she catches you gnawing on her domicile. If you're taller, she forces you to renovate her home for 1d6 months.

4. You trip over, and enrage, a lion, which happens to have a thorn in its paw.

5. You step on a venomous snake. If you apologize quickly enough, you will be spared its scathing sarcasm and biting insults. In the best of circumstances, it's quite the amiable conversationalist.

6. You meet a werebear in mid-transformation. It's preoccupied with preventing fires.

[This table originally appeared here (#RPGaDay2020 6. "Forest").]

Table: Connection

How are the player characters connected? This is the fourth table of the Table of Misplaced Tables.

Connection

Roll 1d8

1. mutual friend
2. mutual enemy
3. are all kin
4. are all colleagues
5. are all former (or current) classmates
6. are all fugitives
7. are all survivors
8. met at a party/festival/gathering

[This table originally appeared here (#RPGaDay2019 30. "Connection").]